Too Much ‘Trying’?

Written By Drew Coverdale

A Patient’s Question

When I awake in the morning, I almost immediately get burning nerve pain in my entire upper body. When I take a shower, ending with a cold bit of it, the sensation will leave and then the pain settles back in my hip/leg for the rest of the day.  I thought of trying to jump in the shower to try to break the body of the habit of getting this pain in the morning or just sitting with it to tell my brain it is safe and do some somatic tracking. I have tried both, but I know I would need to do it for an extended period to get actual results. Any suggestion which I should try first for an extended period?

An Answer

Hi, have a look back at your post for a moment.

I thought of trying to jump in the shower,

to try to break the body

I have tried both

which I should try first?

Can you see how much trying you’re trying?

It isn't the behaviour you choose that dictates whether it will help. Instead, the intent with which you do the behaviour determines whether it will be helpful.

Could you explore the cold shower without being bothered about the outcome?

It is stressful to know that you are doing an activity and then judge its success or failure on the immediate outcome by measuring and evaluating it.

If you are committed to doing an activity which is genuinely effortless and you couldn't care less about the outcome, then there is a moment of success.

It is doing without trying.

It is being without doing.

Dozens of Techniques

Many people go through dozens of techniques and say the method doesn't work. It is the unconscious measurement and default judgement of themselves as their brain is wired to the analysis of the current environment as that’s the best way it has learned to be safe since the onset of their pain, anxiety or fatigue.

Constant analysis of everything in every moment.

The new behaviour is a moment to pause from busyness and noise.

It is to do something without any assessment of its outcome. You are just doing ‘it’. You are it.

90 Seconds

For 60 - 90 seconds of focus and knowing that when it ends, you can happily allow the body and brain to bring back whatever it wants, and you commit to not being phased by that - just once.

And that one moment is the moment the rewiring starts.

So cold is gold, it is a healthy place to start, and you have proof that it changes your sensations.

Could you do the same thing tomorrow and commit to not reacting to the sensation as it settles in your back/hip?

Could you be curious and delighted that you have the power to influence your pain, or would you prefer to be frustrated that you haven't influenced it enough yet?

Be Compassionate

One perspective is compassionate and kind to yourself; the other is harsh and critical.

I guess you've been harsh and critical of yourself for too long, and this small exercise in self-compassion is a great place to start.

So look forward to the opportunity that you've created for yourself.
Tomorrow morning awaits, and that cold shower is your catalyst for change.

Cold is the new gold.

P.s don’t try, and don't forget to wash behind your ears. 

 

What’s next?
Take Your First Step to Recovery.

Drew Coverdale
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